Why…

I’m fine,

Don’t worry…

OK,

I’m lonely.

Wait!

Why am I alone?

I can find someone!

Look he wants me!

Or does he?

Does he want me?

Does he want my money?

My cigarettes?

My alcohol?

My body?

What does he want?

He doesn’t want me.

Not for me.

I don’t want him.

What do I want?

Truthfully?

Who knows?

Because I don’t!

And if I don’t,

who does?

Lonely…

Lonely is such a strong word.

It’s an emotion.

An emotion that hides.

It hides behind everything.

It hides behind anything.

It’s easy to ignore,

easy to disguise,

but it’s there…

What should I do?

Ignore it?

Do that and it surprises you,

and then you’re caught off guard!

You can’t say no…

You want it!

You need it!

But it destroys you.

There you are;

Embarrassed,

Ashamed,

Sad.

Why am I like this?

Why am I alone?

Why am I…

Why?

…